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The Malakoff News
Malakoff, Texas
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August 4, 2006     The Malakoff News
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August 4, 2006
 

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I Friday, August 4, 2006 - The Malakoff News - PAGE 9 Thanks again, Johnny lacono, for the jokes, I truly ap- preciate them. M.R. A defendant was on trail for murder in Oklahoma. There was strong evidence indicating guilt, but there was no corpse. In the defense's.closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client would probably be convicted, resorted to a trick. "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise for you all,*' the lawyer said as he looked at his watch. "Within one minute, the person presumed dead in this case will walk into t~e court- room." He looked toward the courtroom door. The jurors, some- what stunned, all looked on eagerly. A minute passed and noth- ing happened. Finally, the lawyer said, "Actually, I made up the previous statement. But you all looked on with anticipation. I, therefore, put it to you that there is reasonable doubt in this case as to whether anyone was killed and insist that you return a verdict of not guilty." The jury, clearly confused, retired to deliberate. A few minutes later, the jury returned and pronounced a verdict of guilty. "But how?" inquired the lawyer. "You mr/st have had some doubt; I saw all of you stare at the door." Answered by the jury foremen: '~h, we did look. But your client didn't." FAKE TEXANS: Bubba Wayne and Billy Bob, who are from Oklahoma, traveled to Lewsville, Texas for a vacation. While walk- ing along a busy street, they see a sign in a store window which reads: "Suits $5 each, shirts $2 each and trousers $2.50 a pair." Bubba Wayne says, "Woo Hoo, Billy Bob! We could buy a whole glob of those clothes, take 'em back to Enid, and sell 'em to our friends and make a fortune fer us." Bubba continues, "Now v hen we go in there, don't you say a word, okay? Just let me do the talkin' 'cause if they hear your Okie accident, they might think we're ignorant, and they Won't wanna sell them clothes to us. Now, I'll talk in a slow, fake Texan drawl so's they won't know." They go in and Bubba Wayne says with his best fake Texas drawl, "I'11 take 50 of them thar suits at $5 each, 100 of them that shirts at $2 each, and 50 pairs of them trousers at $2,50 each. I'll just back my pickup up and " The owner of the store interrupts, "Ya' 11 from Oklahoma, ain chaT' "Well yeah, says a surprised Bubba Wayne. "How come'd you know that?" "Cause this here's a dry-cleaners." My 3 year old grandson, Jacob, arid I were walking through the countryside when he happened upon some moss and asked me, "Grandpa, what's this?" "I told him, "Why that's moss." REPPOND'S ROUND-UP ! . Mary Reppond As I start my letter, it is the 27th of July -and still no rain in Athens, or on my house at least. There have a few sprinkles around but nothing substantial. The weather has been a little cooler for a few days, but now it is going up again to begin the n' onth of August. Maybe our prayers will be answered before everything dies. We had a large crowd at the center Wednesday in spite of the sad, dry weather. We had a group of seniors who had either moved away or just Stopped coming out, come to meet and enjoy the moming with old friends. They classified the table where they were seated as the "Oldtime Table." These visitors were Ivan and Louise Peebles, Minnie Kirkwood, Bob and Olivia Teel, Mable Seale, Maudine West and nurse to come out to take our blood pressure. Cedar Lake Nursing Services is the one who provided this service. Melanie and Amy who used to be the girls who came have been busy somewhere else but the young lady who was there Wednesday was very nice also. We thank Cedar Lake for do- ing this for the seniors. Please continue to do so. Sherry Northcutt was having test and MRI's done so she could not be with us. I am sure she will be fine, I pray she will. 'Arlie Atwood is home again for awhile, but he had an acci- dent about the time he got home from all his travels. He stepped out of his car and hurt his knee. I believe I told you this, but he was able to come to the center for long enough to see every- one and give and receive a lot of hugs. He is already planning his next trip. That will ake place in Oc- tober. His kids have given him a roundtrip ticket for that. It will be tb Hawaii. Annie and Loanie Rogers were in Abilene Wednesday. They have grandkids who are in- volved with horses, so I am sure they had a good time. Evelia Gonzaly has been visit- ing in Colorado. She said the Delana Cool Everyone was de- weather was very nice where lighted to see all of these old she was. friends. I am sure she was high in the Another long time senior was mountains where it gets really back. She was Gene Morton. cool at night even when it is hot Gene had not been with us for in the daytime. sic for your entertainment. The fun begins at 7 p.m. They will be happy to see you! Chock Chitty is not feeling up to par lately. Say your prayers for him. He didn't join our band Wednesday. Jim Bob and Belle were out with us and Jim Bob said he was still feeling well enough to dance; even toughhe is now having to go 3 days a week for dialysis. Continue to say your prayers for him. Jojuana Gilbert has had cata- racts removed from both eyes and she was back at the center see- ing fine. Glad she had success with the surgery. Yesterday was Billy McWdliams' birthday. He said he was only 39! Everyone who be- lieves that please come to see me. I have interest in several diamond mines in Africa I would like to sell you! Happy Birthday any- way, Billy! I've used all my "news" and it is Friday moming and nearly time to take my weekly trip to Malakoff: Since I have a little room, leR, I'll leave you with this: God is sitting in Heaven when a scientist says to Him, "Lord, we don't need you anymore. Science has finally figured out a way to create life out of nothir g. In other words, we can now do what you did in the 'beginning.'" "Oh, is that so? Tell me " replies God. "Well," says the scientist, ''We can take dirt and form it into the likeness of You and breathe life intoit, thus creating man?' 'Wdl, St IVle:' So the scientist bends down to the earth and starts to mold the soil. "Oh no, no, no " interrupts God, "Get your own dirt." As I have said before and I'll continue to say until it cools down a lot, be careful when you are out in the heat and keep check- ing on the elderly. Lots of love, Mary Ring .- Continued from Page 1 Stephen Rogers never thought Rogers (owner of the ring) got a he would see, or hear of his high call from aman who had found a school senior ring again afler it was class ring:Lance lives in Newlxtt lost in V ginia. Little did he real- News and was a student at the ize that there are some truly re- school where the ring was found, markable people in this world, however he left that school and pro- When Armin found a high ceeded to graduate from another school ring in an old desk drawer high school in Newpcxt News. his first thought was that some- Could he have left something one just might like to have this behind when he left Warwick back. So, he took it upon himself high school? to begin the trek to firid the "Lance was quite emotional He said, "No it isn't - moss have wings!!" several months. Dorothy and A1 Barlow invite owner, when he received the ring back She is one of our older seniors, you to join them on the first Sat- Armin noticed a name on the on one particular Sunday after- Myyoung grandson called the other day to wish me Happy We were all glad to know that urday of each month at the fair- undersideoftheringandwiththe noon and I think I have a new Birthday. He asked me 139 old I WarS, .apd ! He: she is still tip to dancing, grounds in Kaufinan. Their band, school name on it he thought he friend," Armin stated. "I also was qmet i 0r a moment and he you,stat at.!, Well;:x -i aally.haOanother the Lakesiders provide the mu- w0 good finding hc dfroml s : :i" ' the owner. Little did he knowjust ing the week so it truly was a IJlt{llm[$ how easy this was going to be. group effort to achieve the posi- CPAg.BIPAP N. Street. Athe TX (90 ) 675-1058:. 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